I ALWAYS thought of myself as a fearless feminist. With a man like my father, it was inevitable to be brave about who I am. But I soon realised that the world does not give you your due if you’re a woman. I was only 17 when I made my debut. As an actress, I never had any qualms talking about my personal life, my relationships, or the fact that I was sexually active. The lowest phase came when I found myself in a relationship with an alcoholic (Ranvir Shorey) and was beaten up by him. I had these notions, that something like this happens to women who are different from me, from a different background or from small towns. How could it happen to someone like me? The story of the physical abuse was splashed on the front pages of all newspapers and I found that instead of the man being judged for his behaviour, I was put under scrutiny. People felt that I must have asked for it somehow, that I was at fault for picking the wrong man, and should not wash my dirty linen in public. My personal life was dissected and I felt violated, cold and alone.